When we talk about self-esteem, we are referring to one of the most researched and important concepts in psychology.
In fact, in virtually every branch of behavioral science the way we value ourselves plays a relevant role, and helps us understand why we do what we do and why we feel emotional distress in some situations.
Along the next lines we will see several keys to know how to maintain a good self-esteemdifferent habits and strategies to help us value ourselves in the most appropriate way: no more, no less. Low self-esteem is a common problem, but with these strategies you can gradually improve it.
How does having a good self-esteem benefit us?
Our self-esteem, as we’ve seen, is the idea we have of ourselves.to which we add the emotional component of how we value ourselves. That is, it does not simply consist of the information we have about our own identity (content that can be explained in words), but also includes the contents of our emotional memory about who we are.
Of course, there is no single way of interpreting who one is, but there are several possible ways of valuing one’s “I”. However, some of these ways of seeing oneself are more constructive and adequate than others, in the sense that some of them simply keep us in a pessimistic and catastrophic mentality before which we stand still, without daring to break that version of our self-esteem.
In other words, some forms of self-esteem are harmful to oneself, and can even feed and encourage the onset of mental disorders because of its vicious circle effect: as we believe we are worthless, we do not dare to do something that proves us wrong about ourselves and what we are capable of doing.
On the other hand, other forms of self-esteem can produce an excessively idealized image about ourselves, something that often leads to frustration when things don’t go as planned.
In both cases, it is important to know some strategies to maintain a good self-esteem, that is to say, a way of interpreting our identity that serves to keep us in balance between what we can do and what in practice we cannot do now or, in some cases, probably never.
Tips to combat low self-esteem
Let’s now look at different tips for maintaining good self-esteemIt is the only one that is balanced and that does not generate problems in our interaction with the reality that surrounds us.
1. Stop maintaining toxic relationships
It’s natural to have low self-esteem if we’re used to surrounding ourselves with people who don’t value us.
After all, our opinion of ourselves is not an island: it is strongly influenced by our interpretation of how others see us. The problem is that other people don’t have to have a more objective perspective than ours when it comes to determining how we are and what can be expected of us.
So, if you suffer from low self-esteem, one measure to take would be to stop seeking acceptance from those for whom nothing you do is right; simply look for other priorities when managing your time to socialize.
2. Undertakes projects
If necessary, force yourself to start at least one project that you sense you could accomplish if you work hard, and create a calendar of subgoals to achieve one after the other. In this way, you will have a clear perspective about the extent to which you have the ability to do interesting or stimulating things, and even creative in many cases.
However, it is important that you make a real commitment to that goal, so you must avoid falling into excuses so that the fear of failure does not paralyze you. The most useful thing is to set very precise deadlines and even rigid schedules..
3. Question your beliefs about who you are
Just because your beliefs about your identity are deeply ingrained in your thinking doesn’t mean they’re true.. Cultivate the habit of examining your actions in retrospect and compare their existence with those ideas you have about yourself.
When you think of something that went well for you, it’s important to reflect on whether it’s reasonable to think it was just luck: in many cases, the skills and competencies you’ve been developing yourself explain almost all of those personal triumphs.
On the other hand, if you suspect that your self-esteem doesn’t fit reality because it’s too bloated, go the other way: has everything that worked out for you depended exclusively on your actions, or have the actions and decisions of others had anything to do with that result?
4. Enrich your social life
It is important that you expose yourself to diverse opinions about yourself, so that a highly biased idea of the “I” does not take control of your self-esteem. Meet new people, look for friends who share your different hobbies: it is not necessary that all your friends are part of the same group.
This is one of the most strenuous tips for maintaining good self-esteem, because requires cultivating social relationships and friendships in a stable mannerbut it is also one of the most enriching.
5. Take care of yourself.
Source
Tomás Santa Cecilia
It’s hard to feel good about yourself if your body’s physical state is bad.physical discomfort translates into psychological discomfort unless we take action. Sleep well, eat well, and try some kind of moderate exercise.
The segregation of neurochemicals such as endorphins or serotonin help us to feel better, to be more predisposed to good humour, to socialise, to carry out pleasant activities, etc. Doing sports helps the brain feel in shape and gives us an extra vitality, energy and positivity.
6. Go to the psychologist if you need to.
It is entirely natural to see a psychologist when we experience an emotional problem; it is not necessary to have a diagnosable mental disorder.
This type of professional can help you by means of psychological intervention and the resolution of your doubts; fundamentally, he will indicate you several strategies of interaction with the world and with the society that will contribute to that, throughout several weeks, you are constructing a more solid, realistic and functional self-esteem.
Bibliographic references
- Branden, N. (1969). The Psychology of Self-Esteem. New York: Bantam.
- Branden, N. (2001). The psychology of self-esteem: a revolutionary approach to self-understanding that launched a new era in modern psychology. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
- McLeod, Saul (2007). “Psychology Perspectives. Simply Psychology.
- Papalia, D. and Wendkos, S. (1992). Psychology. Mexico: McGraw-Hill
- Triglia, Adrian; Regader, Bertrand; García-Allen, Jonathan (2016). Psychologically speaking. Paidós.
- Vidales, Ismael (2004). General psychology. Mexico: Limusa.