Adaptability and empathy: How can you take advantage of these two qualities to become a better person?
“I adapt to situations.”
“I don’t mind giving in.”
“The others do not give in for me, they are more rigid.”
“If I don’t adapt, others don’t.”
There are many times that people are not aware that they do to us what we consent to be done to us. It is what makes people, especially those close to us, behave in a way that we do not like.
From my point of view, ADAPTABILITY and EMPATHY are two of the best qualities for the development of happiness as I understand it, practice it and teach it: Be the person you want to be and have the life you want.
If you know how to use both qualities, they are designed to be tools that help us to reach our full potential, including difficult moments, in which they can play a decisive role. If we do not know how to treat them, they can become a death trap that leads us to live for or for others, without responding to our will.
The first thing we are going to do is see what these two qualities are.
It is the ability to modify as a function of change. Why from my point of view is it one of the best tools and qualities that we should promote? While stiffness is immobility, adaptation is change, learning, movement. As Darwin said, the survival of the animal world lies in its ability to adapt to changes.
If life is characterized by something, it is by constant uncertainty and constant change. Human beings have wonderful qualities, but they have not taken the time to learn them. We do not control anything external to ourselves, so the ability to adapt to change or uncertainty becomes the perfect tool for life. Eliminate resistance, denial before what happens to give you the ability and power to redirect your life, following YOUR way, taking into account the circumstances. Beautiful right?
Let’s go with the following concept. Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. What is this ability practical for in your daily life? Empathy facilitates understanding and the ability to love, compassion, creativity, so necessary to see the options we have or ways to get where you want, the solution of problems, and of course the advancement and the capacity for forgiveness and therefore, it is very useful in all aspects of the sentimental plane.
The two faces of the same coin
Adapting is not giving in, much less modifying what you want based on others or giving up your dreams due to external pressure. Empathy is not putting yourself before situations, problems, even moments of joy or achievements of others ahead of your own life, what you feel, what you want, what happens to you, or simply what you want to express.
That is why we get confused. Because where we talk about empathy and adaptation there is a certain absence of limits. This is not a big problem, because it can be fixed. When it comes to the question of setting limits, we are talking about one of the great and little-known facets or areas of self-esteem.
What can I do in this case? What does it mean to set limits?
Limits mark what you allow or do not allow/allow to happen in your life, from eating a mint ice cream when you don’t like it, allowing a bad gesture, to working on something you hate. So, when you set limits, what you are doing is raising your quality of life, discerning between what you love and what does not bring you anything positive.
But … if I haven’t worn them my whole life … will I be able to now?
Of course. It is a matter of desire, learning, and perseverance.
When you start to set limits in your life, you are surprised at how thinking that you were going to create conflict or lose “things or people” because of the change, what happens is that people begin to show you more respect, and everything begins to balance.
Now your mind can tell you, “it is impossible”, but it’s only because you didn’t know how to face reality.
Now you know that your empathy and adaptation are good and that in the face of what hurts you you can set limits, which is not a consequence of being a person who adapts and/or is empathetic. It is a matter of self-esteem, and simply by taking a few classes, you can achieve the changes you are looking for.
How do I get started?
Make a list of I WILL NOT ALLOW AGAIN, This is the first step.